Each one of us, has a favourite proverb or saying. My mother’s favourite line is: am I right, or am I wrong? This is accompanied by a defiant expression on her face, which comes with a warning: you better admit I am right. Even when she is wrong. Poor old Pat is more resigned. His wisdom is: damned if you do, and damned if you don’t. Colin, on the other hand likes: there’s nowt so queer as folk. Our youngest son will tell you not to go down that rabbit hole, and oldest son, well, I could not actually recall what he would say, so I messaged him and asked. I got back a whole mouthful of quote, but the words were so profound and in a way stirring, that I think I will conclude with his proverb.

A proverb that I heard on a TV Show, I think it was LA Law-that series from the late 80’s, which has always stuck with me, is:

If you sit by the river for long enough, you will see the body of your enemy float by.

Why it stuck with me, I do not know. It is just one of those things. Now this is a very strange proverb for me to use as often as I do. You see, I do not have many enemies. I tend to follow the advice of some other proverbs:

I choose my battles. I know when to walk away. I do not (or at least try not) carry grudges. I believe two wrongs don’t make a right. I believe action speaks louder than words, hence I try to walk the talk. I know that many a good father has a bad son. I know that least said, soonest mended. I know that all’s well, that ends well. A lot of water has yet to run into the sea. You can’t put an old head on young shoulders. I try to forgive, and when forgiveness is not an option, I know to walk away. Gosh. I sound like Kenny Rogers now:

” You got to know when to hold ‘em

Know when to fold ‘em

Know when to walk away

And know when to run “

So then, surrounded with all this stoic philosophy, why then would I want to sit by a river and wait?

Not all people are good. There are always those, that when they have drifted through your space, will leave your happy aura resembling a jar of 100s & 1000s dropped, the little balls scattered all over the floor. They are still pretty, they can be picked up, along with bit of dust and dirt, and so they will never be the same again. Some people, when they have ploughed through your life like a wrecking ball, leave nothing but your once happy aura scattered. Often, you are left wondering: Why? I believe in building strong relationships with people, and some people I carry with me for a very long time. One such person, I wrote about some time ago. All he has to say is: Ah! Mevrou! (that is what he calls me), and with only those two words, Sirius lights up my world. I am not a golfer, but a golfing joke from my SPF gets me giggling. My Stoep Friend has the most contagious little evil chuckle. But not all men (or women) were created equal, and sometimes, if you sit by the river for long enough, you will see the body of your enemy float by. Those are the people you walked away from, and know when to run. And then to sit and wait for their bodies to float by. We all know a floater when we see one.

Anyway. Enough of all that morbid philosophy. One of the things that bring me instant joy, is seeing yet another photo of our bit of mountain, in Bettys Bay. Now I can think of a few mountain proverbs. Such as, the best view comes after the hardest climb. We have all at least once, moved a mountain. Somewhere between the bottom of the climb and the summit is the answer to, whatever…. Or, how about: How glorious a greeting the sun gives the mountain. Or you can just be the grand old Duke of York who marched his men up and down the hill. Disclaimer: NOT the current Duke of York, though he would have done better had he stuck to mountaineering.

To get back to Oldest Son’s proverb. It goes like this:

“Journey before Destination”

” Some may call it a simple platitude, but it is far more. A journey will have pain and failure. It is not only the steps forward that we must accept. It is the stumbles. The trials. The knowledge that we will fail. That we will hurt those around us. But if we stop, if we accept the person we are when we fail, the journey ends. That failure becomes our destination. To love the journey is to accept no such end. I have found, through painful experience, that the most important step a person can take is always the next one. “

He goes on to explain: it reminds me never to strive to be perfect, but to always just do my best.

This is from a book he read. I am not sure which words are his own, and which are quoted from the book. After so such surprising insight, I was too scared to ask. Instead I sent a polite comment about the words carrying a lot of emotion, yet being so profound, all the while thinking that clearly I did not waste money on all those school fees. He then followed up with his second favourite quote: Always eat dessert first, then go back for seconds. That is more like it my boy.

I suppose the point I am trying to make is this. There will always be somebody who will hurt you, intentionally or unintentionally, as we will also hurt those around us. My conscience tells me that I may well have done just that earlier this morning, even if it was unintentional. Then I also know, that if you sit by the river long enough, things will float by. Unless of course it is you doing the floating. Then I wish you a straw, because a drowning man will clutch at straw. And I will remind you: you do not drown by falling in the water, you drown by staying there. But just know this, if you are drowning in lies, the truth may be your only lifeline.

I need a bit of audience participation. In the comment box, leave me your favourite proverb or saying. Do it, just for fun.