The twelve days of Christmas. This marks the span in Christian theology between the birth of Jesus on 25 December, through to 6 January – the Epiphany, when it is believed the three wise men arrived. For the sake of my last Cape Crawl this year, allow me some poetic license. As I write this, we are counting down to Christmas, eventually, but first there is a wedding. So indulge me…

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty year end stress, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty year end stress, long queues in the shops, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, a suitcase to pack for traveling, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, a suitcase to pack for travelling, lots of Portuguese wedding guests arriving, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the nineth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, a suitcase to pack for travelling, lots of Portuguese wedding guests, a plane load full of Scott Clan, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, a suitcase to pack for travelling, lots of Portuguese wedding guests, a plane load full of Scott Clan, a braai to meet the family, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, a suitcase to pack for travelling, lots of Portuguese wedding guests, a plane load full of Scott Clan, a braai to meet the family, wedding cake and bubbly, and a partridge in a pear tree.

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, plenty of year end stress, long queues in the shops, the arrival of the in-laws from Pretoria, shopping for wedding outfits, a bridal tea party, a painter to paint our walls, a suitcase to pack for travelling, lots of Portuguese wedding guests, a plane load full of Scott Clan, a braai to meet the family, wedding cake and bubbly, three more days to Christmas, and a partridge in a pear tree.

That’s all, Folks!

Have a fantastic festive season. A fabulous New Year celebration, and see you all in January TWENTYTWENTYFIVE!