Disclaimer: This is not to guilt trip any one of you to call or write me, it is just a reflection on what could, and could not be expected, when you move away from your circle of friends.

Some years back, I opened a shop. When you open a shop, or start a business, there are always friends and acquaintances that tell you what a super idea you have, and they will most definitely support you. At the time a wiser person warned me and said: The people you expect to see, you will never see, and those you never expected to see, will support you. Those proved to be very true words.

And so, in moving to the Western Cape, there were those who were going to miss you so much and promised to phone often. There were also those who we were not so close to, that we did not even think of passing on the news of our move. And so, here we are. And this time, I had no illusions around friends and acquaintances staying in touch. I knew that some would promise to be best friends forever but would not. I knew that some would try, but without the ties that bound us, it will gradually become less and less. I was hopeful that we could somehow reconnect with old friends. And that is what happened this week.

We had acquaintances in Pretoria some years back. If anything, they were mutual friends. At some point they moved away, and as one can expect, we gradually lost contact and drifted apart. As we were about to start our beach walk yesterday (this time at Onrus River), my phone beeped a message, and it was this old friend sending a message saying they have heard of our move. They so happen to now live in Hermanus and when can we meet up. Once I made the polite reply, it was vey quickly decided that we meet in 2 days’ time. It was unexpected, but now that we have established contact part of me is so excited about our “date”, and part of me is a bit embarrassed that we allowed ourselves to lose touch. And would you believe it? As I am writing this, another such acquaintance called up. Word has spread, and they believe we now live here. When can we meet up? We did meet up, and what was meant to be a coffee date, lasted 3 hours! And we have already fixed a date to meet up for the next Art Walk – more about the art walk later on.

I have a very dear friend, who has been true to her word. She travels to the Cape every so often, and we were hoping to have another meet up this past weekend. (Unfortunately, it did not happen due to a bit of “palsy” on my part.) I knew that she would keep in touch. I just did not realise how diligent she would be and appreciate that she makes time to nurture our friendship. Also, my friend that sends me a message or a quick call every so often, just to say Hi. And again, those that I thought may drift away – as happens, have been surprising me with emails. Before I open the mails and read them, I first make coffee, and then sit down to have a virtual coffee as I read my friend’s news.

But there are always those that you imagined you would be connected to. Those who you did not leave behind but moved closer to. Folks that you were part of your tribe previously, and you hoped you could hook up again, but sadly, no. Not this time. But that is OK. I am coming to terms with it and am starting to understand and manage expectations. It is OK. If not now, maybe next time.

Then there are other unexpected events that you cautiously approach, and it turns out to be so great, that you wish time away, until the next meet up.

Colin and I did our first Art Walk through Hermanus this past Friday. This happens once a month. There are a number of art galleries in Hermanus (If I told you, you would not believe me, so Google it for yourself!) and 24 of those open their doors to the Art Walk. It is basically “open house”. You can walk in, look and browse. You get to meet the artists and can have a chat -whether about the art, or the weather, it makes no difference. The one chap did not even mention his art, but instead gave us all sorts of ideas of things to do and see in the area. Because of the surprising number of people visiting the galleries, the vibe is friendly, arty and of course…boozy! Turns out, we enjoyed it a bit more than anticipated. We finished the evening off with a meal at one of the small restaurants and got home way too late. In fact, if the small village of Botrivier could ground us for getting home so late, they would have. We had a fantastic evening, and I suspect at the next art walk, we may just meet up what will become our new circle of friends.

Yesterday we had plans for the day, but they were unexpectedly cancelled, and this left us at a bit if a loose end, but it gave me plenty of time to feel sorry for myself. Next thing, there is a knock at the door, and it is one of the locals with a gift of pot plants and 2 small tee candles. Just a hello, and here is a small gift. No strings attached. And it made me realise. As much as I want to keep close each and every one of my friends, some I will keep, some I will lose, and then there will be new ones. Friendships evolve. As sad as it is to lose some, one is reminded by the words of Ecclesiastes that:

To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven.

It does not make it any easier. But it is the way of this world. The ebb and the flow of the tides. It is what it is.

Enough cliches.

Time to move on. Old friends to reconnect with. New friendships to explore. And occasionally: old friends to mourn.

Domino has also had a bit of a wind fall. He has chummed up with a grey cat, called Cat. Turns out Cat also has issues with Tigger, and Domino has received support from an unexpected source. Tigger has been keeping a low profile. Cat is a bit of an Alley Cat.