This past week, Colin and I watched a show on Netflix. It was all about being a minimalist. The basic story line is about 2 friends, who grew up together, and how each of them decided to do away with “stuff.” The first one challenged himself to a gradual process, the next one took drastic measures. But both had the same goal: to get rid of stuff. Apparently, it made both happier people. Despite claiming that I am not a hoarder, I did share with you before in one of my first Cape Crawls, what a task it was to pack up 26 years of stuff. It made me think that we had far too much. However, watching the thing on Netflix had me a little bloated with pride because I never had quite that much.

Not that it was my own doing. It had a lot to do with being married to a Scot (as in nationality, not in name). Scots are known for being frugal, and so, Colin taught me very well how to fix before you toss, think before you buy, fix what you can, and improvise where you can’t. This attitude often came in handy at work. Some clients will book a function last minute, and the chef will wail about what to give them, and my standard response would be: Lets go see what we have, to work with. Making something out of nothing is an indication of how good you are, I would tell them.

One of the opportunities for increasing the volume of stuff we have comes around once a year, and no, it is not Christmas or a birthday (that we have sorted by doing our annual family experience). It is called Mother’s Day! Shops convince children that Mothers like bath salts and bubbles, sold in gift packs with cute little jars and tubs and paper flowers, that nobody ever reuse. It gets added to the stuff pile. Until next year, when it gets joined by yet more. Fortunately, my son has good frugal Scot blood in his veins, and he proudly presented me with a jar of….Horlicks! Horlicks is my favourite winter drink. You can not even imagine my distress some years back when Horlics was no longer available in our stores. Part of me died that year. Horlicks is my best gift. I will use every single last grain of it.

Suddenly one day, somewhere between watching minimalists and sipping Horlicks, my life got really busy. Artist arrived at our door a few days back. I believe you are a culinary expert she says, with frozen fish in her hands. She was hoping to braai (BBQ for my friends from other mothers) this piece of fish, and what am I doing Saturday evening? And so I got roped into having to feed people, using what I had on hand. Copious amounts of wine later, artist claimed it was the best fish ever. The next day, when more sober, she still wrote poetry about the fish, so it must have been good. Word also got out that crazy lady that walks the town and countryside, has skills, and so I find myself discussing all sorts of consultation opportunities with businesses, both local and in the big city: Cape Town. Maybe it will lead to something, maybe not. Iin Sha ‘Allah. This, however, is the least of my problems. You see, marrying a Scot, comes with complications.

Colin does not speak Afrikaans, which is the most spoken language down here. Aunty Google tells me there are 2.8 million Afrikaans speakers in the Western Cape, as opposed to 1.6 million English speakers in Gauteng. Building Inspector is very polite in English, but switch to Afrikaans, and suddenly he can help you with a contact number for the electricity connection. Man from the Department of Roads changed his mind about inspecting the driveway neeeext week, to this week, when I told him in good ol’ Afrikaans of how fed up I am climbing up a mountain. But my biggest challenge of all? So, we are working with what we hope is a very nice Bob the Builder. He is very excited about our mountain house. Jislaaik (for those friends from other mothers: an expression of disbelief.), Colin, it must have taken long to plan this house. Jislaaik, Colin. It is so arty. Jislaaik, Colin. How are you planning to keep the roof on? Did you notice how long that roof is?  After his first two meetings with Colin, I could see that he was battling to understand my Scot, and so I jumped in. Would Colin mind if I maybe had a short meeting with him, just to help him onto our page. I think that every brick, beam, wall tile and tap breathed a sigh of relief, along with Bob. He felt so much better when he could tell me all about everything in Afrikaans. Somehow, a roof in Afrikaans is not so long, after all. I am not too sure how it happened, but I am meeting with him again tomorrow, to help him get some basic admin sorted out. Jislaaik. It will help him so much.

Up to this point, my Cape Crawls were always to tell you about the wonderful things we do down here, and how very nice it is. Well, it is. Hermanus is hosting the “FynArts” festival in June. (For those friends from other mothers: it is word play associated with Fynbos – which is the name for local vegetation, such as Proteas.) A whole week of shows: music, dance, and drama! Everything from Tchaikovsky to David Kramer. As soon as I saw the program, I called our Art Walk friends, and decided on which events we wanted to attend, and not to worry, I will book the tickets. Then everything above happened. I finally got round to trying to book tickets today, and yes, all the good shows were completely sold out. Luckily, Art Walk friends also had a few hiccups, and we all agreed that as much as opening night with Richard Cock conducting would have been nice, we will settle for the organ and sax recital. Not even my best school quality Afrikaans could swing this one.

Since these two minimalists disposed of so much of their belongings to relocate, they now have to start shopping to furnish a guest house. This coming weekend we will be in Somerset West with all of our children. Even the one left behind in Gauteng will be here. Before we have family time, I am taking Colin to all those very nice little antique shops I have discovered, on the way, we will be passing the glass factory. They have the most beautiful tea sets. I just know that my frugal Scot will succumb to those beautifully unique designs. Maybe we can visit a few architectural reclaim yards. Our mountain house will be rather eclectic, with a very long roof. 

But then, that is who we are.