The book of Ecclesiastes, which you will find in the Old Testament of the Bible, teaches that life is random and uncontrollable. So, how do we live well under these circumstances, the author of the book, asks of us? The actual word Ecclesiastes is a translation of the Hebrew word Koheleth, and that, I am told, is a person who convenes an assembly. The book was written by Solomon. Now, in case you did not attend Sunday School yourself, Solomon was that very wise king, who could think outside the box and on his feet. The one who was able to settle a maternity test without as much as a tissue sample.

Ecclesiastes also lends the lyrics to that beautiful song: Turn! Turn! Turn! Pete Seeger wrote the song in the late 1950’s. The lyrics are based on the third chapter of Ecclesiastes, according to the St James version. First sung by the Byrds, when they had a hit with the song in 1965. Since then, it has been recorded by too many artists to mention.

Why the lesson, Sjarlene, you want to know? Because somebody needs to tell the Cape weather that there is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens! Even the Bible tells us so. We are heading for September. In the Southern Hemisphere, that means it is time for SPRING! Instead, what do we have? Yet another weather warning today of a level whatever storm surge, accompanied by absolutely everything I am so fed up with. I recall only a few months ago, I would randomly wake up at night and still my mind so I could hear the ocean off in the distance. Now I wake up, and I am too scared to listen just in case my ears confirm what I would rather not hear: the howling wind. Do you recall me getting all lyrical about mist covered mountains? Well guess what, I have seen enough mist. The same goes for rain, and everything that goes with it, whether it is mildew or raging rivers. Somebody, please tell the Cape to stop. Spring is meant to be in the air, not weather warnings and storm surges.

I chatted to a couple of Western Cape long termers recently. You know the ones? They have lived here all their lives. According to them, they can’t recall when last, if ever, they experienced a winter like this. I suppose that is meant to bring me some comfort. What I do want, however, is just one day. Just one day where I can comb my hair and arrive at wherever it is I am going knowing that my hair is still in place. Just one day, where I can hang washing out and go out later in the day and find it as I left it – on the line and not tangled in a neighbour’s shrub. Just one day where I can step out and take a walk. Just one day without my extra thick, and now rather unattractive jacket. But, more than that: just one day of no sneezing. Oh, my. I suspect that by now I may well hold a Guiness Book of Records best for the most sneezes in a day. Because, wind brings dust, and dust brings sinus.

Looking on the bright side, this time of year is also when the Aloes in the veld are at their most beautiful. Aloes and Arum lilies. The two most unlikely neighbours, yet they grow side by side. It’s a bit like Tequila and salt. You can’t imagine the one with the other, until you see them together, and then you just can’t imagine them apart. Not speaking of experience, of course. Me drinking Tequila? Never….

Now, if only the Cape would stop blowing and allow spring in. I want to drive past fruit orchards, painted pink by blossoms. I want to go to my favourite “stalletjie” and buy peaches and apricots. I want to come home with more apples than we can eat. One specific variety of apple has such an enthralling fragrance that I keep one in my handbag, because it makes everything in it smell nice. I want to take beach walks with a licky cone, one where I get to eat all the ice cream before the wind blows it off in sticky little rivulets. In short: I want summer.

But clearly, the Cape does not care much about my wants. Like Bob Dylan, the answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.